Impermanence bothers me. I feel like everything changes but it’s distressing to me. So much can happen in just one day. It’s frightening. Life feels like a series of shocks of jolts to the system. I feel I can’t take it. The fact anything could happen at anytime. I feel like I’m recoiling from it all. I know nature is a cycle of growth and decay but I don’t want to experience loss and pain. It’s too much to deal with. The fact it’s all spinning constantly and passing into memory is distressing to me. I feel like I just want to assume the foetal position. The idea in Tibetan Buddhism that all these transitions continue after death is troubling too. The fact that as you get older everything just becomes a blur or cycle of meaningless events. It all makes me feel the meaninglessness of everything.
I feel our society doesn’t offer us anything in terms of rites of passage. We are just expected to work till we drop then die or go in a nursing home. It’s like a soulless society. No humanity.